Personal baggage when listening is, to my mind, the most difficult noise to overcome.Inform them that you really want to listen to what they have to say and really want to engage, but it is very difficult to have a conversation when one person is using very emotional or extreme language. Whilst it may not seem intuitive given that we are talking about being able to paraphrase and reflect what the speaker is saying, this is the time to stop the speaker and call them out for the emotional/extreme language. Another difficult one for those of us not in control of our own emotions.“Under what circumstances do you see that affecting/being important/occurring…?” is another useful form (Read the article: “The Power of “What…?” to learn more). “What do you mean by.?” is the simplest form. Never let an acronym go unchallenged and use “What…?” questions when the context is ambiguous. This is reasonably simple to deal with by asking questions of clarification. Don’t allow the distraction to build to a point where you stop listening. The trick if you find the speaker is distracting you is to paraphrase or reflect often. The first step is to be self-aware that the speaker is distracting you.
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